Friday, June 28, 2013


There is a movement I've been hearing about lately, and have been reading their blogs and books, called Men Going Their Own Way (MGTOW). I'm not sure if the acronym is pronounced out "Mag-tow", or just spelled out. I don't think it matters.

I haven't kept quiet that my wife is divorcing me. I saw it coming years ago. Looking back, I think she was trying to goad me into divorcing her at least five years ago, but I wouldn't bite, because damn it, I had a Christian duty to honor my "till death do us part" vow to this cold heated, unforgiving, nagging, unpleasable woman. And I was determined to fulfill it, even though I was miserable and didn't expect it to get better.

I'll never claim to have been a perfect husband. I was faithful, and I provided for her and the children, even going so far as to move 180 miles away because the job market in New Jersey sucks. I let her parents and her sister live in my house, even though all it did was drive us farther apart and I felt like an outsider in my own home. I never saw signs any of them appreciated it. They sure as hell didn't appreciate that it killed what little was left of our marriage at that time.

I'm not going to feel sorry for myself. I know there is a healing process. I'm pissed off about it, but I guess I should be more pissed off at myself for rushing into what turned out to be a bad marriage. I love my boys though.

I'll likely carry the scars with me for a while.

And of course, I can no longer advise young men to marry. As the current generation coming of age is finding out, most of the promises they were given turned out to be bullshit. "Go to college so you don't have to flip burgers!" they were told. Then they go to college, and can only get a job flipping burgers if they're lucky.

I don't like logical fallacies, and I don't like to commit them. I don't want to create a hasty generalization that pretty much all western women are a lost cause. They'll turn around and divorce you for no cause at all just because you don't make them "happy" (or as Dalrock says "haaaaaaaaaaaaapy"). They'll even manufacture evidence and set you up if needed. There is no covenant among them, even within the church. My "Christian" ex-wife was advised by some of her "Christian" friends to divorce me. A pastor's wife even told her "If divorce is on your heart, then you should do it". How do you compete against that? How do you even trust a "Christian" woman in that type of environment, when they'll all band together in a solipsistic cluster bomb against you? I'm only aware of one woman who supposedly tried to talk her out of it. I don't even think her mother tried to talk her out of it. And at least one of her sisters, the one I let live in my house rent and responsibility free for 7 years, tried to talk her into it.

I definitely want to enjoy and experience what a marriage is supposed to be, not being chained to a cold hearted, unforgiving, unpleasable (insert adjective here). But are there any left? Do they even exist?

Men who go about having sex with many women claim there aren't, at least in the west. Most western women are a lost cause, they say. I hope not, but I'm waiting to see evidence they're wrong.

In the meantime, where does that leave me? I don't feel comfortable advising young men to get married, even though I know without marriage and family, culture is over. We all die off. I don't even know what to tell my own children. My ability to set a good example for them was ruined by their own mother who cut my balls off in front of them for years, then cast me aside in favor of "happiness". (I'm pretty sure I saw the book "Eat, Pray, Love" in the house at some point).

Guys like Aaron Clarey talk about how men no longer have an incentive to work hard and do great things. What's the point of building a great and successful career if some woman can simply decide she's not "happy" and take more than half your earnings and retirement?

Clarey recounted a story of how himself and a "millionaire pilot friend" tried to approach girls to go dancing, and damn near had the police called on them. And no doubt, these stuck up bitches later in life will wonder "where are the good men", when they flipped out at two independent men who just wanted to dance.

Apparently, a lot of men are "Going Galt", working about enough to get by and enjoying life outside of that. They're ignoring women. Not pursuing dating or relationships or marriage.

Even if there are decent women left, where do you find them? They're sure as hell not on the online dating sites. I won't do bars or clubs, but I doubt they're there. You only run into them on the street in movies. I'm pretty much back to where I was before I met my ex-wife, where friend will tell me "You need to meet a nice girl". I would say "Great! Do you know any?" and be told "No, can't say I do".

Maybe MGTOW is the best way. At least over the next year or two, I'll probably follow their ways. I've got to get things pulled together. I've got to get a motorcycle. Eventually, I need to get living accommodations where my boys can come stay with me if they want to.

I got my growler back from my friend, so I can start going on a microbrewery tour.

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