Monday, February 16, 2015

Why Do Old People Act Like Everything Is The First Time?

I know, respect your elders.

But when you're out and about, dealing with them can sure be annoying. First, they drive way too slow. They should not be allowed to drive anymore.

They also move really slow. I hate getting stuck behind an old person in a narrow aisle or walking through a door.

Several years ago, I went to Ponderosa on a Sunday late morning (quick, before the Baptists get out of church!) There were two old women in front of us. At Ponderosa, you order an entre, get your drink, then sit down and eat from the salad bar until your steak or chicken are done.

These two old women were absolutely mystified by how the soda fountain worked. I couldn't understand why. But they were, and I had to wait for several minutes until they figured out how to get liquid into their cups and move on.

Another disturbing aspect of these two older women (I estimated them to be in their 70's) was at the salad bar. There were some tasty looking buttered rolls. Between the two of them, these old women squeezed just about every roll before choosing one each. I started losing my appetite.

I was nowhere near as courageous as I am now. I wanted to ask them in any of the 7 or so decades they've been on this earth, was this the first time either of them EVER ate at a Ponderosa type restaurant?

Another aspect of old people that pisses me off is when they pay with checks. Almost every time I get stuck in line at a store behind an old woman writing a check, when she's asked for ID, she has to spend several minutes searching her purse for her driver's license.

I assume most of them have been writing checks since the 1960's or so, and always wonder why they always act so surprised and unprepared when asked for an ID.

I always tell myself, when I am an old person, I will not act like the old people who annoy me.

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